SWAN, Clara

Hi Clara, welcome to Potter's Army.

I think you'd benefit from cutting down your character's classes to just one or two, as most people can't keep up with more. It doesn't mean she can't be doing the others ic, only that you won't role play them out.

Auburn is a hue red. Your playby's hair isn't red. I meet a lot of people who don't know what colour auburn is and just think it's light brown so I thought I'd better let you know. ETA: it's okay if your character has different coloured hair to their playby. I just see this mistake so often I thought I'd make sure you weren't making it.

I need you to flesh out her general appearance more. We already know about height and weight because it's written there, so the only thing new in that part is big features. Most people use that part to write about how their character presents herself. So how does she wear her hair most, what sort of clothes does she like, does she have any distinguishing features like freckles or scars, does wear glasses or radish earrings? That kind of stuff.

Her strengths & weaknesses need to be modified, as beauty isn't exactly a strength (though the way she uses it could be) and being controlled isn't a weakness so much as a dislike, unless you mean that she's easy to manipulate. If you're going to have two strengths, I'd like you to list two weaknesses as well, thanks.

In her personality, down to earth doesn't seem to match someone who kisses people randomly. Can you clarify how those two go together for me?

Thanks a lot!